Our weekly date reminds us of why we fell in love
And no one ever said you have to spend money to make your weekly date night count. Or that it had to be a weekly date night. While we love the experience of eating at a nice restaurant, there are other ways to have a great time together that are just as fun and don’t cost much (or anything at all!). As long as we’re intentionally spending time together we count that as a date night!
We were such different people when we started dating then we are now. So not only do we get to remember why we fell in love we get to fall in love over and over again. Continuing to learn about each other and with each other helps us stay connected.
It gives us something to look forward to
For most of the week, we’re grinding away at our jobs and trying to keep up with all of our responsibilities. Even though we both work from home, and even sometimes work together, that’s not about us. But date activities are about us! So when we have a lot of deadlines and a lot of work looming over us we can look forward to a real break.
It’s amazing how good it feels just to focus on each other
You don’t need to go to a fancy restaurant or stay out till 2 AM. I would find that sort of thing uncomfortable and unnecessary at this point in my life. Did we do it when we were first dating? Absolutely. But again, we’re different people now. Sometimes our weekly date literally looks like going for a walk without any electronics so we can spend quality time together.
Basically, any time my partner and I have had an argument, we can pinpoint it back to the fact that we haven’t had enough alone time together recently—that’s usually where the spark of disconnect starts. So making sure we take that time with each other is really important.
It helps us remember that we’re a team and that we’re important to each other
When we get caught up in the mundane details of life, we can forget how much better and more efficient we are as a team. We don’t just need each other; we actually make each other better. As individuals, it’s easy to feel like you’re not enough—that you’re not doing enough or being enough. For us, date night is our weekly reminder that in partnership, we can achieve and do more than either of us could even dream about doing alone.
This might sound weird, but there’s something about getting ready that makes us feel more invested in each other and our relationship. It’s about intention. It’s so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day activities of life and start treating your partner as someone who just lives with you instead of your teammate. I read a long time ago that when you fight it’s important to separate what you’re fighting about. So it’s not you against your partner. It’s you and your partner against the problem. Regularly dating each other sets us up for success there.
How we make a weekly date night a non-negotiable part of our schedule
One of the most important aspects of our relationship is making connections a regular part of our schedule. When this doesn’t happen, we find ourselves feeling disconnected from each other, anddddd sometimes fighting. But we want to maintain that fun and excitement we had before we got comfortable together. Don’t get me wrong, the comfort is nice. We love the comfort and the lazy evenings watching tv. But we don’t want to not know each other.
Since it’s easy to fall into the trap of letting date night slide, make sure to give it as much importance in your life as you would any other important appointment or task on your calendar. How we do that is by defining date night differently. Date night does NOT have to mean getting dressed up and going out. We define dating as intentionally spending time with one another. Sometimes going to the grocery store without electronics can be a date. Sometimes J and I will go to the gym together and he will teach me new work outs and stretches when we’re at the gym based on what my goals are. Any time we are intentionally connecting with each other we are dating.